The Naked Chef

It sounded like lots of pots being thrown around and then silence.

Silence is never good.

I decided I had better investigate.

My naked chef had set up her mixing bowl, cracked a few eggs and started mixing her eggs. All by herself.

Then she thought it was a good idea to weigh her mixture.

By then I was just curious to see what would happen next so I let her keep going. Out came the chopping board, ham and a butter knife.













I guess she just really liked her ham and cheese omelet that we made for lunch.

My Valentines

Shame on me.... I forgot

I forgot to tell you that Tina from Little Tots/Big Ideas did an International Mommies post on little ol' me. Forgive me, because it was last Tuesday that this event happened. But you can still check it out now.

I have had a few things on my mind in the last week - shall I tell you all about it?

• We have put our car in to the mechanic to have ONE particular problem (that the mechanic seemed to create in the first place) fixed THREE times and still the problem persists. So last week I had to organise for it to be "fixed" for a fourth time. GAH!!

• Along with the problem car, I have had a problem wisdom tooth. We have health insurance to cover basic dental work, but no cover for tooth extraction. The good news is that we are so "poor" the government said they would pay for my wisdom tooth to be taken out. So if you read any loopy posts on this blog next Wednesday (WT-day) blame Dallas - it is obvious he didn't take the computer away from the drooling crazy lady in the corner fast enough.

• After a morning of frenzied weeding and mowing on Thursday I bent down to fix LQ's shoes for the fiftieth time. As I finished up with the shoes I spied a rogue weed and twisted (yes, twisted) my body to rip out that little pesky weed. Unfortunately my back didn't like the twist and sent out a call for help by way of stabbing pains that dropped me like a bag of wet cement. I lay on the small rocks that cover most of our yard and garden (I am still trying to work out the logic of the rocks) and cried out in pain. LQ was no help (why do I keep her around?) and I slowly hobbled/retreated back up the stairs to lay on the bed and feel sorry for myself. Not before rearranging things in the yard so it didn't look so trashy and having a shower with LQ to make us less sweaty and more sweet smelling. My back has since been making me pay for the extra things I did before coddling it.

• My mum has been in a different state for the past three weeks now and I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I am starting to suffer from the lack of mother contact. I can generally get on with my life once little things like the above mentioned have happened because I get to tell mum (and everything is better when you tell your mum). But this past week? I have been stewing on all the bad things. Come HOME MUM!!

A Bit of LQ Lovin'

I absolutely adored seeing this when I went to check if nap time was being used wisely.


LQ had pigtails for church last week. This is noteworthy because she hardly lets us touch her hair, so to get TWO hair bands in was a triumph.

Prince William will be requesting friend status on Facebook shortly

So many things happened last week to keep us from taking our small vacation to Melbourne to watch a few games at the Australian Open.

Dal and I were determined to go, however and we managed to pull everything together thanks to help from my sister and our friends/neighbours.

It turns out a few celebrities heard we would be there and showed up to say they had been in the same arena as the Petersens.

Roger Federer decided he would play tennis just for us.



Prince William of all people wanted a piece of the Petersen action and we had a few brushes with him. Once while we walked through the park to the Tennis.



And once while at the game.



Lacoste asked Dal to be their new model. pfft to Andy Roddick.



Dal kissed Roger Federer



Half naked older men threw themselves at me.



I caught myself in the bathroom after I had a nice spa bath while watching "The View".



While Dal lived and breathed Tennis

I have missed you

and it's only been three days. I need to get a life.

Here's a sneak peek at my steamy two night get away with my lover.



That's right.... Dal watched tennis on television (when we weren't watching it live) and I took self photos.

It's all a bit of silliness really

And then Dal said "and you were on the phone with Bro yelling orders about what should be done for dinner, saying go to KFC and buy me some chicken". Which couldn't have been further from the truth if it had jumped into a rocket, shaved all it's hair off its body (so it could be aerodynamic) and tooted its own path all the way to the fourth world (Borovnia).

What really went down was a slightly more boring domestic version of wife avoiding making dinner; wife giving random excuse of meat refreezing and making us all sick if it was eaten; wife on phone with sister; wife doesn't care what we eat; wife would rather starve herself than eat anything that takes any effort; husband once again contemplating pizza; husband suggesting pizza...

AND THEN

"we can have pizza and if you like I can go get some KFC for you" - said with a decidedly displeased expression pasted (with strong glue) all over his face. Displeased because he was already in his pyjamas. Displeased because driving is hard. Dear Husband, pizza is fine with me. I don't need KFC. I can see that the suggestion was made because you love me, but I can also see that the suggestion may be causing you some discomfort.


Dal likes to make large and grandly obvious false statements about what I do and say. He waits with a grin on his face for my somewhat predictable reaction. Mostly sputtering, opening and closing mouth and lots of denying. And he will keep it going until I realise that he is teasing. Then we have a good giggle, he smacks my tush and we go to sleep.

I am pretty certain that the immaculate conception would have been just as miraculous had Mary been a little less of a virgin ...

and it wasn't the Son of God that was conceived.

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For a good week and a half I was pregnant.

At least my body led me to believe I was pregnant. And we had done everything in the correct sequence (stood on our heads by the light of the full moon before dancing up and down the street chanting our ancestors names)

I was excited. Dal told me not to get too excited. He wanted to wait it out and see what things were like after 12 weeks.

I subdued my excitement (a little).

And then I got my monthly (is it still monthly when it doesn't show up on time?) visit from the "You're Not Pregnant" Fairy.

My body sighed. And I said I was fine. But I cried in the shower because showers encourage thinking. And I wasn't ready to think.

I felt silly for being excited. As a matter of fact I felt downright dumb.

Then I thanked God for LQ. And I gave my extra love to her. Which she gave right back with a kiss and a giggle.

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In short, I have begun to realise that conception is a miracle whether you are a virgin or not.

Christmas Leftovers

There are a few things that I have done recently that don't seem to warrant just one post, but I wanted to show you anyway.

During the lead up to Christmas I was making gifts for not only LQ but for a friend's little boy. I am currently finishing the rest of the quiet pages, but here's the product that was presented on Christmas day.










LQ couldn't help herself with that last one!

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and then there was my brilliant idea for putting away Christmas decorations (I am sure everyone else thought of it before me, but I was very excited to think of it myself)


It's an egg carton

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last thing to mention is my disease. I am becoming obsessed with recovering chairs. I have to be physically restrained when I go to a second hand store. I was browsing one such store yesterday and it took ALL my energy to talk myself out of buying a chair and ottoman for $20. Tell me I'm normal.

This chair I bought for $15. I thought it would be a piece of cake to recover and then I discovered the stripped screws.











And there you have it. Some of what has been happening around here. More on the rest of my life tomorrow.

Exhaustion

I was thinking of naming this post "New Year's Eve Party", but "Exhaustion" seems a more suitable name.

A family friendly NYE party was the order of the day. Of course this means I was up until midnight the previous evening making confetti. Next time I will buy it.

We counted in the new year at 8.30pm (I am hedging a guess that it was before anyone else in the world). Lots of noise and lots of mess. Lots of fun.

Christmas Aftermath

Here is my traditional Christmas picture vomit.

Waiting

It is Christmas Eve.


We are waiting.


Waiting for a little person to close those tired eyes and dream of Santa and Snowmen and Christmas Trees and Jesus (does anyone dream about Jesus?).


And then we will pull out the hidden presents, that were not so well hidden, and assemble.


Many of LQ's gifts this year are handmade or seconds. She will be receiving a miniature chefs apron (just her size). A slew of second hand clothing all bundled up to make a fun dressing up box. A no-sew tutu. And then the mother of gifts (not handmade) - a big beastly plastic monstrosity with a slide and stairs and a place to put a sprinkler in the Summer (which it is right now).


And while I wait I will tell you what Christmas in Australia is like for me.


Christmas means singing carols like "I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas" and not really meaning it. Until I have had a white Christmas... and then I sing it with meaning.

Christmas smells like rain. Wet, hot and sticky mornings with thunderstorms in the afternoon.

Christmas means Santa with three fans blowing on him to keep him cool.

Christmas lunch may be a BBQ on the beach or still the traditional roast, but always with sweat pouring down my face.

The same sweet Christmas smells pervade the air in America and Australia, but in Australia you get to smell them long into the Summer evening as you sit outside and catch up with friends.

Christmas means fake Christmas trees. Try finding a plump, non-sickly looking fresh Christmas tree in the middle of Summer in the tropics. It is MUCH easier to go to Target once a decade to replace the faux tree that has slowly shed its plumpness.

Christmas is communities gathering in outdoor areas to sing carols together while holding candles in cups. Wax dripped deliberately on the picnic blanket. The larger "Carols by Candlelight" are televised and usually have the Wiggles welcoming Santa on to the stage.

Christmas means new toys for Summer vacation e.v.e.r.y year.

Emphasis is placed on end of the school year exams and NOT pageants, recitals and general forms of torture.

Schools have closed for Summer vacation well before Christmas. This means many harried mothers are trying to entertain their offspring as well as gift shop discreetly and engage in general festive activities. There is a price to pay for missing school Christmas recitals.

Christmas in Australia sometimes feels like trying to keep traditions where traditions generally don't fit. We are a country too young to have our own traditions, trying to make our own traditions but still desperately clinging to the old.

Regardless of its different scents, songs and food and whether we are in America or Australia or some other country Dal and I will always remember and centre our Christmas around the birth and LIFE of Christ... and things wont seem all that different.

Christmas Dress

Granny Jules, affectionately known at the moment as "Grules" sent LQ a Christmas dress to wear the Sunday before Christmas. We took some pictures AND a movie. At the moment LQ only has a pair of boots that fit and some sneakers. We went for the boots with the dress. It is quite an eclectic ensemble, but we think it works for LQ.

Moose Hunters

LQ loves Mickey Mouse and gang. That's no secret. Since coming back from visiting Granny Jules in July, LQ has had an insatiable hunger for the old cartoons. Dal has a whole collection of them, so we have been fortunate enough to not have to endure just one DVD the whole time.

This doesn't mean we don't know ALL of them by heart. We do. Dal and I will hum or whistle along to the background music of any given short.

And yesterday I caught LQ imitating one of MY favourites, "Moose Hunters". If you want to know what she is watching when she does her little shoulder shimmy, start watching the cartoon from 3.25 onwards.

Evolution

It is my theory that we should continue eating all the refined foods so that one day our children's children's children will thank us.

Thank us for conditioning our bodies to take the food that is now widely available and will continue to be widely available. Our ancestors did it, so why can't we?

Take one for the team and eat a cake (or a slab of fudge) today.